Northern Ireland’s Euro 2022 adventure may have come to an end with a 5-0 defeat by England, but the atmosphere at St Mary’s Stadium was one of celebration. The team had achieved their goal of reaching their first major tournament, and the players and staff gathered on the pitch to sing and dance in front of their supporters. Rachel Furness, a fan favorite and Northern Ireland’s all-time leading goalscorer, was at the center of it all, conducting the crowd with a ‘Green and White Army’ flag. However, behind her outgoing persona, Furness was struggling with her mental health.
Before the Euros, Furness had been questioning whether she could continue playing. She had no escape from her personal struggles, which included the end of a long-term relationship and her father’s illness. Despite the success on the football side, Furness wasn’t happy with herself in that environment. She reached a breaking point during the tournament but decided to stay after talking with her teammates. However, after the singing and dancing were done, Furness knew she needed to take a step back from the team she loved.
Furness released a statement a month after the tournament, making herself unavailable for international duty for “personal reasons.” The decision shocked many, but for Furness, it had been a long time coming. She had conversations with staff about her feelings and why she couldn’t carry on. It was tough for her to express herself and she initially blamed herself for her struggles. However, Furness knew she had made the right decision for her mental well-being.
During her hiatus from the national team, Furness made a risky move to Bristol City in the Women’s Championship. She didn’t know anyone at the club but saw it as an opportunity for a new beginning. The environment at Bristol City was fantastic, and it helped her create a life off the pitch as well. Furness believes that while mental health support is now common in women’s football, there is still work to be done in normalizing players seeking help.
Returning to the national team was something Furness never expected, but as her life improved on and off the pitch, she began to consider it. She made herself available and eventually wore Northern Ireland’s colors once more in April 2023. Furness was nervous and unsure of how she would be received, but stepping over that white line and putting on the shirt again was a significant moment for her. She hopes to lead by example and show that being vulnerable is not a weakness, but the ultimate strength.
Furness acknowledges that her playing career may be coming to an end in the next couple of years, but her love for the game remains. She wants to continue being honest with herself and her teammates, leading by example and showing that vulnerability is a strength. Furness hopes that young girls will look up to her and see that she was strong in her decision to step away and come back.